chosen chaos

I am SO excited to wel­come an IRL friend to these pages today!  Meg from Pres­sure Cooker was tech­ni­cally a friend of a friend but then that friend got mar­ried on a beau­ti­ful Isle and Meg became a friend!  THEN she started a blog to sup­port her book dream and insert me!  Since she wrote her first post I have been a fan.  She makes yummy yummy things and incor­po­rates her tri­umphs and strug­gles of being a new Mommy into one.  IRL she is beau­ti­ful, kind, and WAY way fun!  I’ve been to her place before and now she’s here!  Talk­ing to her 18-​​year-​​old self of course!!

Meg, if you had the oppor­tu­nity to sit down with your 18-​​year-​​old self what would you say to her?

Dear 18-​​year-​​old me:

Oh the possibilities…..you are fin­ish­ing your Senior year of high school, get­ting ready to head out of state to col­lege.  You are con­vinced you will grad­u­ate and imme­di­ately replace Katie Couric on the Today Show.  Luck­ily, in a few years you will real­ize it is far more likely you would instead spend the first 14 years of your broad­cast jour­nal­ism career bounc­ing from one small town to the next report­ing the 4 a.m. traf­fic.  You will decide to change your major – GOOD MOVE.

You will love college…you will keep your clos­est high school friends for life (so don’t worry) and you will meet some amaz­ing new ones. DO go to your first dorm meeting…you will meet some life-​​long friends who will be with you through the jour­neys that lie ahead.  DO ignore the oh-​​so-​​friendly peo­ple sit­ting behind fold­ing tables offer­ing free T-​​shirts and CREDIT CARDS…..the debt will fol­low you for the next decade….keep walking….in fact, RUN.

You believe in sec­ond chances…and third and fourth.  This is one of your most endear­ing qual­i­ties but you will find it also to be one of your great­est weak­nesses.  Choose wisely whom you give those chances too, more often than not, you will only be disappointed…..two, three and four times over. 

When you fin­ish under­grad you will move to Atlanta and become a flight atten­dant for a year.  DO THIS….it will give you more per­spec­tive and more free­dom than any­thing else you will ever do.  You will get engaged at the ripe-​​old-​​age of 23….fortunately you will see through the haze and call off the engage­ment long before you ever start plan­ning your wed­ding.  FOLLOW YOUR HEART….TRUST YOURSELF.  I am not going to tell you not to say “yes” because although this will be one of the hard­est times in your life, it will also allow you to under­stand what you want out of life.  More impor­tantly, it will show you every­thing you DO NOT want for your­self and it will com­pel you to accept noth­ing but EVERYTHING you desire. 

You will want to leave Atlanta after this happens…you will think VERY long and hard about leav­ing the city (and the heartache) behind you.  DON’T LEAVE.  In a few short years you will meet the most amaz­ing, lov­ing, sup­port­ive, gen­er­ous man and YES…..you will marry him (but be patient because it will take four LONG years of dating…badgering, beg­ging and threat­en­ing will not make this man move any faster….but he is WORTH the wait!).

You have never had a prob­lem fol­low­ing your passion(s)…you have a prob­lem with focus.  WORK ON THAT, PLEASE.  Give your­self a chance to breath, to think hard about how you want to spend your days.  You will ignore me (because that’s what you do…when some­one tells you some­thing is not a good idea, you make it your life’s mis­sion to prove them wrong…WORK ON THIS ALSO, PLEASE).  You will try every­thing from Golden Gloves box­ing (which you will soon real­ize is only fun until you get hit in the face…hard), to writ­ing and per­form­ing stand-​​up com­edy on the Atlanta cir­cuit (you will be funny, you will open for some great comics and you will have the time of your life for two years).  You will get your MBA, which will help you finally find a career you can sink your teeth into.  How­ever, find SOMEWHERE ELSE, ANYWHERE ELSE to get your degree…..otherwise you will find your­self with a $60,000 stu­dent loan that you will be pay­ing off until you can no longer recall what degree you hold.  BE SMARTER WITH YOUR FINANCES.

You will have your share of heartache, loss, pain and tragedy.  You will RISE ABOVE IT because that’s what you do….just don’t be afraid to lean on peo­ple, you don’t always have to be so strong.  You are always the first to reach out to every­one around you, to lend an ear or a hand, to let some­one cry….give your­self the same cour­tesy and I promise THE WORLD WILL NOT STOP TURNING ON ITS AXIS.   

NOW…back to your hap­pily ever after.  You will have the most amaz­ing pro­posal, wed­ding and honeymoon….and your hus­band is more than you could ever have dreamed for your­self, BONUS!   DO play hard to get (for the first time in your life) with this one….works like a charm.  When he tells you he loves you for the first time you will say “thank you”….but don’t worry, he doesn’t hold it against you and it makes for one FANTASTIC story at your wedding.

Together you will build a life and start a fam­ily (I know you want a house full of boys but JUST PREPARE YOURSELF…a lit­tle girl will open pieces of your heart you never knew existed).  You will even­tu­ally become a SAHM (shiver).…TAKE THAT, MBA (and sub­se­quent stu­dent loans).  It will be worth it though and FINALLY, you will have found your place in this great big world.

You have a big heart…you also have a sharp tongue.  SPEAK LESS….LISTEN MORE.  You prob­a­bly won’t (again with the stub­born thing) but you could save your­self from hurt­ing a few peo­ple and putting things into the uni­verse you can’t get back. 

THREE final thoughts for you (me):

1.)    Don’t kiss the guy at the bar in Wind­sor your Sopho­more year….he will give you your first cold sore and it will be YEARS before they come out with Valtrex.

 2.)    Your boobs WILL NOT GROW…not even when you gain your Fresh­men 15 (or 20, or 25)….but don’t waste time or money try­ing to pad them or push them up.  You will get the BEST birth­day present when you turn 26…two of them J.

3.)    MOST IMPORTANTLY….live in the moment, stop wish­ing for the future and stop wor­ry­ing about what lies ahead.  The next 113 years of your life will be gone and in the blink of an eye you will be here (writ­ing to your­self).  GOOD NEWS…you will be HAPPY, FILLED WITH LOVE and SO VERY THANKFUL YOU DIDN’T LISTEN TO YOUR OWN ADVICE.

Love and lots of wine,

Your Future, Wrinkle-​​Faced, Extremely Happy Self

 XOXO

Meg is slowly work­ing her way into this bloggy blog world of ours.  Please check out her site and become a new fol­lower of hers!  She is also on Twit­ter!

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